Bede: Ending Domestic Abuse

The Bede Starfish Domestic Abuse Project works with people affected by domestic violence. Our aim is to help you and your children live free from fear. If you are being abused within a relationship, we can offer advice and support to help you protect yourself, take action and rebuild your life. Nearly ninety percent of our clients live more safely as a result of our help.

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How we work

At Bede, we talk things through, face to face, with you.

Based in Southwark, we work across the whole borough to help people from all backgrounds build their confidence and live free from abuse. If you are suffering domestic abuse, we can help you to:

  • assess the risk to your safety
  • make a safety plan to protect you, and anyone else close to you who is at risk
  • understand your legal rights
  • know what danger signs to look out for
  • rebuild your confidence
  • sign you up to our Freedom Group and peer support group

Our new Bede Choir sings Stronger

During the coronavirus lockdown, Strictly Come Dancing star Hayley Sanderson has created a Bede Choir of survivors of domestic abuse.

Our animation reflects how peer groups can play a vital role in our Bede: Starfish Ending Domestic Abuse programme. To support the programme, Strictly Come Dancing star Hayley Sanderson helped create a Bede survivors' choir. Here they are singing a cover of Britney Spears' Stronger.

Working with music professionals, they and Hayley have recorded their version of Britney Spears’ inspirational song ‘Stronger’ and released it nationally. The song aims to raise awareness of the help that’s available for those in abusive relationships, and to raise funds for Bede and Women’s Aid’s work in London and across the country: Bede Choir, ‘Stronger’.

What is domestic abuse?

Domestic abuse is any incident or pattern of incidents of controlling, coercive or threatening behaviour between those aged 16 or over who are or have been intimate partners or family members. The abuse can range from physical violence to psychological, physical, sexual, financial or emotional control. Further issues of concern to black and minority ethnic (BME) communities include so-called ‘honour’ violence, female genital mutilation (FGM) and forced marriage. Victims are not confined to one gender or ethnic group.

We can also offer specialist support to those suffering domestic abuse who are:

  • young people
  • being abused by their child
  • affected by mental health issues
  • without recourse to public funds

Comic Relief commissioned leading artist Rapman to raise awareness about domestic violence. He spoke to women at the Bede Starfish Domestic Abuse Project whose moving stories inspired him to create this 10-minute video.

What you can do next

  • Get in touch for a confidential chat.
  • Join one of our support groups for survivors of domestic abuse.
  • Arrange to receive counselling.

Contact us

If you, or if someone you know, is at immediate risk of physical violence, dial 999.

In a non-emergency, dial 101 to speak to the Metropolitan Police.

Contact Bede: Ending Domestic Abuse

Email us: ahlamlaabori@bedehouse.org

Call: 020 7237 9162

Our office is open from 9.30am to 4.00pm, Monday to Friday. For out-of-hours emergencies, please contact the National Domestic Violence Helpline: 0808 2000 247
Contact Bede Starfish Domestic Abuse Project.

Download our Bede: Ending Domestic Abuse Brochure

Read more about our Bede Starfish Domestic Abuse Project work and how we can help you.

A woman in a canoe rows forward into a brighter future - the aim of our programme Bede: Ending Domestic Abuse.

Charmaine’s Story

Meet one of the many brave and inspirational women who have broken free of domestic abuse. She is sharing her story, and her strength, to help you to come forward and reach out to your Bede House friends.

Charmaine had been married for 5 years when her husband, an older and controlling man, began supplying her son from a previous marriage with cannabis and alcohol. When Charmaine objected, her husband started to beat her. As the beatings continued, he told her she could not leave the house or speak to anyone. On one occasion Charmaine went out to attend a family party, but the husband tracked her down, dragged her outside and beat her brutally in the middle of the street. Following police intervention Charmaine spent some time in a refuge before returning to London, where she contacted Bede House.

“I was in a bad way when I came to Bede House. I didn’t know what to do. But from the very start they showed me that I was not alone, that they were there for me. Through counselling and weekly group sessions, they started to teach me how to get through it, how to cope. The other women on the course also gave me great encouragement.

“On the practical side, Bede House helped me get a non-molestation order against my husband, and an occupation order to have him removed from our home. I honestly don’t know what I would have done without their support.

“Now I am much calmer in myself. My youngest son, who is four, is also calmer and more positive. We live together in the house we once shared with my husband. Thankfully we have no contact with him any more. Bede House is not far from us and we know we are welcome there at all times. I would not hesitate to recommend their services to any woman who has experienced domestic violence or abuse.”

 

THANK YOU TO OUR FUNDERS

Bede: Ending Domestic Abuse is supported by City Bridge Trust, Henry Smith Charity and United St. Saviours.